Just about enough

To be perfectly honest, I feel that Paeds is the attachment (so far) that I've enjoyed the least.

Strange, the one specialty I had been planning and dreaming to do eversince I decided to go into medicine, it let me down.

Or rather, I've let myself down.

Maybe it's because of the circumstances, I didn't really enjoy the hospital rotation. It was done in such a way that you don't have any particular attachment to the department. Perhaps it's also because I had such an amazing time in O&G that when I started Paeds, it did not meet my expectations.

Don't get me wrong, paediatrics itself is an interesting subject.

But then, why do I wake up in the morning, trying to find excuses not to go for lectures although it's just 2 minutes' walk away? I still attend, of course, but more often than not, I sit there being (overly) critical of the lecture, and feeling cross at the same time.

I know I'm over reacting, but I cannot help it, no matter how many times I try to psych myself up, trying to be optimistic.

You see, I'm one of those people who can't change their minds about something once they've made their mind up. VERY unfortunate.

Disappointment was the first emotion I felt when I started this rotation. And it stayed that way, mostly because my mind refuses to see the silver lining around the dark cloud.

I've had just about enough. With the rotation, and with my negative attitude.

Not again!

Yup, changed how my blog looks. Not that it makes any difference, but self-satisfaction is important, u know..

Have O&G and Paediatrics exams on 17th March, which explains why I suddenly have the burning desire to blog + change the template instead of studying.

Can't wait to go home.

It's 2:19 am. I better sleep.

Had a late night last night (don't ask me why, coz I'm not gonna answer you..you may guess though *winks*) and I set my alarm to wake up early, had resus training skills at 9 am. Tengah sronok2 tido, had a nice dream even, I was woken up by a loud knocking at my door.

"Sapela yang datang pepagi bute ni..." I looked at my clock.

It was 8.33 a.m.

ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

I somersaulted off my bed onto the floor (hehe drama la sket..) and opened the door and told a much-surprised Shar "Go, go! Don't wait for me!!" (ala2 citer perang gitu...)

I got changed, brushed my teeth, washed my face, even had time to put on my contacts, packed my stuff. Ran from Floyer House to the bus stop in front of Royal London. Bus came just as I arrived (God is really great!)

Called Shar to ask where she was, and discovered I was only on the bus after hers. Met her at the bus stop, walked to the resus building.

I made it on time.

The duration from when I jumped out of bed to the time I got on the bus was 10 minutes. TEN FREAKIN' MINUTES!!

Well, if you're not impressed, I am. Me, who usually take 45 minutes on average to get ready in the morning.

Hehe I know what you Malaysian people out there think : "Tak mandi la tu" with smirks on your faces. Well, darlings, nasib baik la kat UK ni sejuk lagi....so you can get away with not showering in the morning and not smelling like you haven't. Kalo kat Malaysia, alamat memang ponteng la kelas pagi....

Begitulah drama pagi ini. Sekian.

-TAMMAT-

Howdy folks! Here I am again, trying to avoid doing the Paeds essay I have to submit tomorrow. The progress? Abysmal. Nope, I'm not very enthusiastic when it comes to doing this essay. I find that the older I get (as I am INDEED getting older, like it or not), the harder it is for me to make myself do the things I don't like or do not want to do. Can't even bribe myself with chocolates or shopping trips or anything!

See, even I myself am having trouble to manage me!

I've heard people say, 'It's all in the mind', 'The only thing that's stopping you from going far is yourself,' yada yada yada. Well, they didn't say that to me la. Might as well actually. But it's usually one of those things those self-motivation gurus tell people.

Of course, those darn perky, sickeningly optimistic people are right. But that does not change anything. I am still sitting here after three hours (cumulatively), after chanting 'You can do it!! It will be over by tomorrow' for the gazillionth time, I haven't moved that very much.

Ah, well.....just have to do it v.e.r.y. s.l.o.w.ly I suppose. With me kicking and screaming and swearing as I go along. (Ok2, not swearing la...thought I'd dramatize it a bit more).

Found a little something of Friendster, someone posted it on the bulletin. With the thought of qualifying sometime in July next year (insyaAllah), this certainly does not lift my spirits any higher.....

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Malaysian Govt Doctors Criteria

Criterias for becoming a Malaysian Govt Doctor.

There's no need for an aptitude test. Students should consider these requirements:

1. No life outside medicine; this includes dating, sports, clubbing, chores for your parents and
visiting the toilet.
**Even now I feel that I need a life!!!!!

2. Not to live with your parents. Move out ASAP as they will never understand the ludicrous working hours that u go through. Furthermore, chores are not suitable for u as to rule No. 1.

3. Not to be married until completion of all 4 years of Govt Compulsory service as u will be transferred left and right to some of the most remote Govt clinics in Malaysia. Having wife and kids to follow you to your new working area may increase high level of stress on all parties. Furthermore, if your spouse is a Govt Doctor, he/she will also be transferred away from u and
no matter what appeal is made, KKM will put up a deaf ear (unless u have big cables or of a certain skin color).

4. If married, not to have children until u finish all 4 years of Govt Compulsory service, as to
which u and your spouse will not have much time for your child/children or they end up not recognizing u and refer the Indonesian maid as their mother (change in language patterns commonly follow).

5. To obtain life insurance once your govt service begins as there is not many claims for accidents during work. Don't be fooled, Doctoring in Malaysia is hazardous.

6. Able to withstand 36 hours of non stop work and stress without mistakenly labeling Left for Right or uvula for vulva (or Volvo S40)

7. To buy a car with complete safety features (like I'm doing) which includes multiple airbags, ABS, EBD, side-front-rear-top-parallel and diagonal impact bars and seat belts to ensure survivability if u are involved in an accident because your driving resembled a drunkard maniac after working in the hospital for 40 hrs non stop.
**With the pay doctors get? Is that even possible??

8. Constant supply of coffee

9. Nicotine Patch as u will have the urge to start smoking due to overwhelming stress

10. Interest in watching medical sitcoms such as House MD, Scrubs, ER, Grays Anatomy and Chicago Hope to inspire u to continue your life as a doctor as the exciting things u see on TV does
not resemble the real life of a Malaysian govt doctor.
**This is true ANYWHERE actually. You don't see the doctors on tv doing hours of paperwork.

11. Not to have any pets or plants (not even cactuses) as u will have no time to feed or care for them and eventually all will end up in your mortuary.

12. Able to endure the stench of your own sweat as to when 36 hours "on call" does not permit u time to bathe or freshen up.

13. Able to carry on working without food or water over 15 hours. ( I was in OT for 16 hrs without food, water or bathroom breaks). If during fasting month, able to break your fast with water for injection as u had no time to buy food.

14. Able to come to work with fever/cough/illness or physical disability (sprained ankle etc) as to
which doctors do not deserve MCs. (My MO was on crutches during rounds)

15. Able to stand scolding, destructive criticism, kiss ass behaviors, racial bias, finger pointing, scape goating, and incompetency from your superiors.
**Sigh...this is one of the things I dread most. They treat junior doctors as if these people are less than human. How can we aspire to be a first-world country if we can't let go of our third-world attitude?

16. Able to withstand the jealousy when your friends call u up for some fun and ur stuck in the hospital during on call.

The list goes on. These requirements should be sent out to all doctor wannabes and for them to determine if their life coincides with the Malaysian Medical Health service of doctors under KKM. I LOVE THIS JOB!

Slow and Steady

Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment. They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

How Do People See You?

Uh huh....tell me something I don't know.....

A note from outerspace...

Hello everyone.

This page has been inactive for a while (yes, I warned you). For those who still come and check whether I'm still alive or not or whether I've been kidnapped by aliens, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, I am still alive and kicking. As for the latter, the aliens found out that I'm an anomaly and I wouldn't represent the human species accurately so they decided not to kidnap me (the nerve!!). And I forgive you for the curses you muttered upon finding that my blog hasn't been updated for the one gazillionth time you've visited.

Was blog-surfing today - yes, although life's been busy, I've not taken leave from being a very kay-poh person, so I still know what's going on with people I spy on!-...where was I? Oh yeah, I was blog-surfing today, and then suddenly I miss my own blog. Thought I'd visit to say hi.

It's already February, where did all the time go? Must have sped forwards when I wasn't looking.

I made a career decision. To be exact, a career change. I want to do O&G. No more Paeds for me. I still love children, more than ever, but I don't think I want it as a career. Of course, the fact that I had the most fabulous time during my O&G placement might have something to do with it. Amazing consultants, amazing doctors, amazing midwives, amazing nurses. What more do you want?

Am actually doing Paeds at the moment. After the fast-paced O&G, Paeds seem paler in contrast. It's still nice to play with children, but I keep getting distracted by them anyway to notice the important clinical signs. So yeah, I don't think I'd be a good Paeds doctor although my rapport with children is great.

Went to the Royal Academy of Arts yesterday to see the 'China : The Three Emperors' exhibition. It was beyond words. You have to be there to understand. Really, it was one of the best I've seen.

Okla, dah penat cakap dah. Till next time!

Happy New Year!

December passed without a single entry. It's been a week since 2006 came. Goodness, I'm such an inconstant blogger.

Apologies friends, apologies.....haven't much time for blogging nowadays. Been busy living my life, I guess...not much time to impart my 'wisdom' or vent my frustrations here.

What's been happening this past one month and one week? Let's see....hmmm..had my Locomotor exam, learned a few dance steps here and there, made new friends, and most importantly, I WENT HOME FOR CHRISTMAS!!!

And I didn't tell anyone abt it. Well, not many people. When it comes to keeping in touch with people, I'm the worst. Not that I don't think of them, I do..I'm just not one of those who call the whole neighbourhood to announce my homecoming.

Neways, went home for abt 10 days, had a BLAST! My niece is now approx. 9 months old, and she's SO ADORABLE!

Now I'm back in London, been 1 week already. Started O&G rotation, absolutely loving it! Have a brilliant consultant, one of those people who can inspire students to do better.

But of course, Paediatrics still rock my boat. O&G a close second.

Just wanna announce to you ppl out there faithfully checking my blog that I won't be blogging often (it's nothing new, I know, it's not as if I've been a regular blogger these days, just thought I'd make it official....lessens my guilty conscience I suppose..).

If you want to read nice blogs, go to my links section. Those people are fab!

Over and out!!

I have an exam coming up, and I'm nowhere near finishing my revision.
I have a project outline to hand in at 10 am tomorrow, and yet I'm still struggling to read through the journals.
My dirty laundry is spilling out of the laundry basket.
My room's a mess.

And yet, despite of all that, the world seems bright and beautiful. It's great to be alive!!

That sounds wonderfully optimistic of me, does it not?

Either that, or I've totally lost my marbles (which is most likely)

Ah, well...

A long overdue update

Hello kengkawan! Lamer tak update. So very sorry. Have been caught up with lots of things, and during that time all my modal + ideas for my blog remained only in my head. Jangan risau, you didn't miss much, it's the usual lawak kering and my cynical comments.

Neways, update!! Kenape tetibe nak update ni ye? Senang saje jawapannye. It's because I have Locomotor exam next Friday and I'm trying to get away from studying by doing other things (seperti biasala...korang takkan tak kenal yours truly by now!).

What's been happening this past month? (In chronological order - well, sort of)

1) Hari Raya Puasa

Masih lagi bulan Syawal kan? So I'd like to wish you people out there Selamat Hari Raya. Had a really great Raya this year, with lots of visiting and makan2 (biasala, kita kan org Malaysia). I would like to (regretfully) report that all the weight lost during fasting month have been recovered plus 5% interest (ehehe takpe...seluar masih muat lagi...)

Lepas solat Hari Raya at Msia Hall

2) I turned twenty- erm...one er..two..okay okay, twenty-three lah!

It's official. I'll be turning into a crone soon. Dah tua!!! (ehehe no offense kepada insan2 yang berumur 23+1, 23+2 dan seterusnya....)

"Eh alamak! Ade coklat jatuh ke?"

Since I'm 23 now, does it mean I have to start acting like a responsible person??

3) I played netball for Nottingham Games

For those who know me, I bet they're having cardiac arrests right now. You see, Azhani Akmar and sports had never been mentioned in the same sentence. You can only find the association between the two in the book of antonyms (figuratively speaking, of course). The only type of sport I specialize in is 'berenang gaya kuat lentang statik'. When I told my dad about it (netball, that is), he actually laughed! Now my dad is the nothing-more-than-smiling-when-it's-funny kind of person, but I actually heard a nice hearty laugh from him! Talk about parental support! (but then I guess Abah knows me more than most people...)

QMUL netball team and Westminster netball team

In my defence, it's not that I avoid sports like a plague, it's about finding the right people to do it with (ehehehe...alasan...alasan..).

Oookay! Next!!

4) I picked up gardening!

Okla, I exaggerated a bit. Received a flower pot of purple African violets, which are gorgeous! According to Terren (who gave me the violets) it's really easy to take care of, even a person like me can take care of it. Sure hope so. Even cactuses can die if put under my care...no kidding!

BUT, nevertheless, I am happy to inform that the violets are flourishing, I do water them religiously (twice a week so takla susah sangat) and to add to my collection I bought myself a pot of patio roses!

Couldn't stop myself. Saw them at a shop at Homerton Hospital. But I read that they can grow up to 2-4 feet...hmmm...macam maner eh...

Ah, who cares. We'll cross the bridge when we come to it.

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So yeah, that's the update for now...At the moment, am crazy over Malay songs..been downloading quite a few from jiwang.org...hai...inilah nasib orang di perantauan...bila dah jauh baru rindu lagu2 Melayu...

Short announcement

Yup, I'm back.

Did you miss me? (Rhetoric question, DON'T answer that. Really.)

Will write more soon (you can take it as a threat if you want).

Maybe in a few days' time.

Oh, well....

The Phantom Menace!!! (err..kitchen menace)

I guess you get them every year; those nutcases that think other people's kitchen utensils belong to the general public (What is this?? Communism???).

I thought what happened last year wouldn't repeat itself with new tenants in the flat. Looks like these people help themselves with pots and pans and whatnots that don't belong to them.

Don't get me wrong, borrowing is fine with me, AS LONG AS they wash them and put those things back from where they came from. AND if they took good care of them.

Aaaaaaaaaaa!!!! My non-stick periuk!!!!!! Habis calar!! *howls in frustration*

(If I knew the culprit, abis kena pelangkung hantu tu!!)

*takes deep breaths in and out* (Sabar Hani....bulan puasa.....)

If I believed in karma, I'd think that I did some unpardonable sin in the past.

Seven things to...

Hello people.

Back again. Been quite busy (ahah what else is new?)

Playing tag again, this time it's a bit different. Peah, thanks for tagging moi, kalo tak alamat tak di'update' la blog ni.

Neways, here it is!!

7 things you plan to do before you die

1) Go for hajj with with my own earnings

2) Travel around the world. Would love to see historical sites in China and India, also Egypt again.

3) Hopefully, insyaAllah, memorize more surahs from the Quran, if not all

4) Do my part to help starving children around the world

5) I want to learn ballroom dancing (weih, jgn aaa gelak!)

6) Learn one or two other languages

7) Skydive

7 things I cannot do

1) Stay awake during lectures (yeah! it's true!)

2) Lie. Susah giler. Mesti terkantoi

3) Hold a grudge for long. No matter how bad that person is.

4) Having said the above, if I don't like someone, it's very difficult to change my opinion

5) Sit still for a long time (No 1 of this question a good example)

6) I can't skate (though I wish I could)

7) Wear high heels for long. My feet would kill me! I don't know how other women do it!

7 things I can do

1) Balance things on my head. No matter what shape and size (as long as tak berat sangat la)

2) Use utensils with both my right and left hand (I'm a leftie)

3) Sew (ehehe Peah...saja jek taruh yg ni ;P)

4) Dance the waltz

5) Touch type

6) Sing all the songs from the musical 'Les Miserables'. If any of the actors fall ill, I'll probably be able to take his/her place (ahaha fantasi semata-mata). Oh yeah, also songs from 'Sound of Music'

7) I can remember the most nonsensical and useless facts in the world (e.g. what's Barbie's full name? And also what was the first phrase said on the phone by Alexander Graham Bell when it was invented?) and yet I can't remember simple things like people's names.

7 celebrity crushes

**This is a bit tricky. I can't recollect having crushes on celebrities, but I did have crushes on people/characters as below:

1) When I was very young = Prince Eric from Disney's 'The Little Mermaid'. Because he had dimples (pathetic giler kan?)

2) Luke Skywalker. I used to think that if I married him our children would be strong in the Force (isyk...fantasy..fantasy..)

3) Gilbert Blythe from 'Anne of the Green Gables' (played by Jonathan Crombie). My pre-adolescent crush...he seemed like the ideal guy to me at the time.

4) Adam Sandler's character in 'The Wedding Singer'. How can a girl not have a crush on a guy like that?

5) John Truitt from 'Meet Me in St. Louis'. Only when he wore the tuxedo.

6) Mr. Darcy (Colin Firth) from Pride and Prejudice. Enough said.

7) Ummm can't think of anyone else so I'll have to leave this vacant...

7 often repeated words

1) Busuk giler!

2) Gila ah Labu!!

3) Suke hati jek..

4) Tak senonoh betul...

5) Apekah??

6) Ooo yeke?

7) Ntah pape ntah

7 things that attract me to the opposite sex (in no particular order)

1) Smile

2) Eyes

3) Good rapport with people (esp. own family members)

4) Excellent rapport with kids (penting!!)

5) Gentleman-like behaviour (what can I say...I'm old-fashioned)

6) Character

7) Someone I feel I can respect

7 tags to go to...

1) Suedemokhtar

2) Raihan Rozlee

3) Yatt

4) Niesa

5) Kitte Pryde

6) TeaDrinker

7) Sesape yg terasa nak jawab soalan2 ni...

Ooooo iye ke....

Global Personality Test Results

Stability (73%) high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.. Orderliness (63%) moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly organized, reliable, neat, and hard working at the expense of flexibility, efficiency, spontaneity, and fun. Extraversion (36%) moderately low which suggests you are reclusive, quiet, unassertive, and secretive.

Take Free Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

trait snapshot:
secretive, organized, clean, rarely worries, solitary, high self control, dislikes large parties, prefers organized to unpredictable, prudent, observer, tough, self reliant, very good at saving money, introverted, perfectionist, mind over heart, not controlling of others, hard working, confident, resolute, solitary, does not make friends easily, finisher, does not like to stand out, very practical, intellectual, unsympathetic at times, honest, respects authority, follows the rules, cautious

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*ala korang....bagi chance la...skali skala nak boost ego sendri...*

Working weekend

I'm working this weekend (work, but no pay - the life of a medical student).

Yup, have to go to hospital for the 9-4 shift.

When you have to go in on Saturday and Sunday, you don't look forward to the weekend as you would do if you had both days off. Feels just like any other day.

And I tell you, it's NO fun.

People usually don't like Monday, coz that means the week has started and it's time to go to work after the weekend. Wednesday, well, that's when you feel that life is pushing you towards the edge of the cliff, but you console yourself that it's halfway through the week so things can only get better. Friday - everyone's favourite day (after Sat and Sun) because it's the last day before the weekend. Saturday + Sunday - favourite days of the week; the time you sit back and relax, doing whatever you want.

So when you have to work 7 days a week, there's nothing to look forward to! Every day is the same!

Suddenly realized the importance of weekends in keeping me sane. I want my personal time back!! (Please! Before I go crazy!!)

Well, actually this is my last working weekend for this rotation (ehehe saje jek melodramatic sikit tadi). Will be following the paramedics on the ambulance tomorrow...wheee!! (isyk...nampak benor ke'jakun'an ku yang tak pernah naik ambulance....neeenoooneenoo!)

Yup, I've gone mental. The day has finally arrived.

Your Blogging Type is Pensive and Philosophical

You blog like no one else is reading... You tend to use your blog to explore ideas - often in long winded prose. Easy going and flexible, you tend to befriend other bloggers easily. But if they disagree with once too much, you'll pull them from your blogroll!

What's Your Blogging Personality?

'Long-winded' huh? I SO know what you mean. That sums up my personality quite well.

The cow jumped over the moon

Hello kengkawan,

The subject today takde kena-mengena dengan yg idup atau yg mati. Just thought of the phrase.

Started A&E rotation last Monday. Memula slow giler, tapi skarang agak best jugak. Saw some very interesting cases. Chaperoned for a VE the other day, am quite convinced that O&G is SO not my thing.

Doing night shifts today, and this coming Sunday, Monday and Wednesday.

Tiring, but fun

You are my ice kacang....

Did I ever tell you I ADORE acappella singing? Have lots of mp3s of acappella songs, mostly by Rockapella, an Australian group. Yesterday my sister sent me a song by this Singaporean group, it's SO chomel!! Been playing it so many times.....

Just wanna share the song with you. If anyone's interested, let me know and I'll email it to you ok? (Kalau nak la, kalau takmo takde kecik hati de....)

::Ice Kacang::

You always say I'm unromantic

Don't know ways to make a girl tick

I must say you're right about it

For I am truly unpoetic

But I am not dumb

I'm not that stupid

It's just that sometimes brain not working

So I didn't sleep

Use my little wit

To write this little bit

You are my ice kacang in this tropical heat

You are my favourite dessert (ooh la la!)

So inviting so sweet

Would you like to bubur chacha (chachacha!)

Come along and dance with me

For you are my love, my tutti frutti

Someone I like to eat

Everytime when we go dating

First the movies then go shopping

You always hint I'm unexciting

It has been so since the beginning

But I am not dumb

I'm not so stupid

It's just that sometimes I'm a blur king

So I didnt' eat

Use my little wit

To write this little bit

You are my ice kacang in this tropical heat (my heart melts for you..)

You are my favourite dessert

So inviting so sweet

Would you like to bubur chacha

Come along and dance with me

For you are my love

My one atap chee

Someone I like to eat

Each time I look into your eyes

I see some pretty colours, very nice!

I wouldn't mind paying any price

I'm kacang over you

(I say go honey dew!)

Tagged!

Been tagged by Peah..thought it'll be fun to play along...

20 years ago, 1985

To be honest, I can't quite remember much...my eldest sister was seven, I was three, and my youngest sister - my playmate and confidante - was born. We were staying in Klang at that time. I must have done what every 3 year-olds would do (or not), but as I said, I can't remember that much....

10 years ago, 1995

Gosh, has it been THAT long? This was the year I entered Form 1, was one of the pioneers of the newly-built SMK Puteri. I remembered the first day of school, wearing the baju kurung with the light blue kain, looking at the prefects with awe. I thought that they were so grown-up then. I was a shy first-former. Most of my classmates in 1 Sigma were from my previous school (SRK Convent..in fact, SMK Puteri IS actually a Convent school in essence, we had to change the name when we moved) so it was not hard to settle in.

1995-1999 (Secondary school)

**This part saje tambah sendiri....**

Some of the best years of my life. I felt that I truly bloomed (ewah) from an awkward, shy person to a confident teenager capable to take on the world (hehehe a bit of dramatization here). Spending my years at Puteri school shaped me to become the person I am now. There were lots of happy memories : the gossips in class, the pranks we played, the Canteen Days, Teachers' Day etc. Going to the field for PE and doing the UDTA (you know...jangkauan melunjur, bangkit tubi, tekan tubi, lari 1500m). We'd come to school the next day (if we ever came at all) having sore legs, abdo and arms (biasala....tak biasa buat exercise..hehe).

During pre-exam period, many of the girls in my class would mysteriously disappear from school...no, not to go out lepaking at Terminal One, but actually to study. Kiasu giler.

One of the sweetest memories of school was when my class put up a musical - Rodgers and Hammerstein's Cincerella - in the (then) new school hall. We were Fifth Formers then, and we thought that if we didn't make use of the hall, we'd never have the chance again. So there we were, amidst preparations for SPM, we took time to rehearse, do the props, paint the backdrop, choreograph the dances. I had to choreograph the waltz, and I remember the hours my sister and I spent in front of the tv trying to find inspiration from the original movie as well as some others. We never had a full rehearsal before the actual show, so on the day itself, we just did the best we could. Raised quite a bit of money, we did (it was open to the public) and the proof of our hard work can still be seen in school, our class name immortalized on the two stone benches bought with the profits 'Sumbangan Ikhlas daripada 5 Sigma 1999' (hehehe benches..but hey, at least we contributed something to the school)

5 years ago, 2000

Lots of things happened this year. Went for Haj with family, which was most memorable and uplifting experience. Entered Kolej Matrikulasi Melaka for 1 semester, my first time being away from home. It was a bittersweet experience : more bitter than sweet. Opened my eyes to many things. Got my scholarship (alhamdulillah..), enrolled into Kolej Mara Banting. Had the funnest 2 years, can't forget the Block F parties we had!! We SO rock!! (heheheh).

2 years ago, 2003

I was in my 2nd year Med course. For some reasons I can't share with you, it was the most depressing year of my life, can't remember how many tears I shed. Thank God for my parents, who were always there for me...and God sent me my guardian angel, who kept me sane and never failed to cheer me up.

Last year, 2004

I was halfway through 2nd year, and then started 3rd year in September. Things turned out for the better when I entered 3rd year, so it was half good, half bad.

This year, 2005

3 and a half months left. My niece was born 22nd March this year. Had the best summer holiday. Am very happy, alhamdulillah. Looking forward to the days to come.

Next year, 2006

I'd be a finalist September 2006! (InsyaAllah..) Ackk!! I hope that by that time I'd be equipped with the knowledge and skills to become a PRHO...

10 years from now, 2015

33 years old huh? When I was 13 I thought 23 was a green old age. InsyaAllah by this time I'll be making progress in my career, thinking of paediatrics as my main specialty (maybe sub-specialize even further..what do you think?). Hopefully I would've settled down by then, with ummm a few kids of my own? How many? Hmmm entahla, have to discuss with their father *winks*

Since this is a game of tag, I'd like to tag KittePryde, Teadrinker, Amydoll, Yan and Yatt.

TAG! You're it!!

A review on 'Pride and Prejudice' (aka 'Hah! I told you so!!')

(Word of caution : The person writing this is a die-hard fan of Jane Austen and the 1995 BBC dramatization of Pride and Prejudice. There will be a lot of criticism in this piece, so if you're faint-hearted, please do not read further. Don't say I didn't warn you. )

The new 'Pride and Prejudice' movie was released for public viewing last Thursday. Can't really recall what the comment was on the movie poster, but I won't sport your intelligence. I recall my vehement refusal to watch the new movie when I last wrote about it, and until yesterday I still objected strongly towards contributing even a single penny towards the movie. But when a few friends wanted to go and watch it yesterday night, I went along. It was Friday night, and I had nothing else to do. Besides, I was curious.

Spent 4.20 pounds on the ticket (thank God for concessions!) and we sat almost at the front row (no, the cinema's not like the one in Malaysia, where sitting in front will result in the inability to move your neck afterwards).

It was the longest 2 hours of my life. When the movie started, I think the first expression on my face was a wince. My thoughts (or rather, objections) on the movie are as below (it's easier to list them down, I think..):

1) Everyone rushed through their lines. I know it's hard to squeeze everything into a 2-hour movie, but it gave the impression that none of the characters paused to even think of what they were saying or going to say.

2) The Bennett family was portrayed as a family living in poverty (well, almost). Living conditions were almost pitiable, Mr. Bennett looked as if he's never owned a comb before (Donald Sutherland's talent was totally wasted). They seemed almost savage, no traces of a genteel family whatsoever. As I understand it, the reason why the Bennett sisters were considered 'poor' was because their father's estate was entailed away from the female line, and thus they had little to inherit from. Although they were not well-off, they lived comfortably, NOT as how it was portrayed in this new movie.

3) As Austen wrote it, out of the five Bennett sisters, Jane and Elizabeth were the mature and sensible ones and were regarded highly by people in general, Kitty and Lydia were the wild sisters, and Mary somewhat ostentatious. There is a marked difference between all the sisters. In the movie, I thought all of them were equally ridiculous....Mrs. Bennett wasn't particularly impressive either. Come to think of it, EVERYONE was ridiculous.

4) Bingley in the movie looked like a silly chap who didn't have his own mind. And where is the chemistry between him and Jane? They were more like two teenagers infatuated with each other.

5) Wickham didn't seem like a real villain to me. The character's on-screen time was too short. The whole scandal between Lydia and him as well as the story involving Darcy's sister just went unnoticed. It did not leave much impact.

6) Mr. Collins was so kayu.

7) Mr. Darcy.....was he a proud man? He was more like your average rich man who was misunderstood by everyone. And what's with the puppy-dog eyes? I was quite disappointed with the fact that they didn't portray him as how it was in the book. But, as I said before, Colin Firth IS Mr. Darcy, so anyone else's effort would be futile.

8) The only good point about this movie was that they made it more like a comedy (although it was ridiculous more than anything), and thus the average person (who's not an ardent Austenite like yours truly) would enjoy it nonetheless.

Jane Austen must be turning in her grave. Judging from how the movie was, she must be turning over and over again (macam ayam kena panggang atas api kat Kenny Rodgers tu...metaphorically speaking, that is, I mean no disrespect).

Throughout the movie, there were a few times when I closed my eyes/closed my ears/slapped my forehead/buried my head between my knees/shook my fist at the screen. Most of the time I looked at my watch. Couldn't wait for the movie to end.

As I said, it was the longest 2 hours of my life......hmmm....I think I'll spend my time tonight watching the BBC version...5 and a half hours of pure pleasure =)

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

Dear citizens of planet Earth :

I would like to proudly announce that I HAVE OFFICIALLY MOVED IN!!!!

Well actually, I finished unpacking late Saturday, went to IKEA on Sunday to get a few things (a pillow, 3 glass jars and a wooden stool - which was originally a plant stool but who cares?) and now my room is all set!!

My room when i first moved in

My room now

Staying in the same halls on accommodation as in 3rd year, and I actually got my old room again (which is VERY good luck for me, students usually get reassigned new rooms....rezeki...alhamdulillah...). Saves the headache of trying to figure out what goes where. Anyone who saw my room last year would still see the same kind of arrangement, only with less clutter.

Boring, you say? If anyone wants to redecorate my room for me, you are more than welcome...

The motto for this year is : Do NOT buy anymore things!! When it comes to packing you'll be sorry!!

Started 4th year officially today. Doing Locomotor module, started with Sexual Health & HIV lectures. I must say, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. Actually found the lectures interesting, although I do still lapse into my old habit once in a while (i.e sleeping during lectures...I'm notoriously known for it among my course mates). If ever anyone wants to evaluate his/her skills as a lecturer/presenter, I would like to extend an invitation to run that lecture/presentation by me. Only the most enthusiastic and interesting of lectures can keep me awake...So, any takers?

Ack, gtg. Have to cook. I know some of you visit my blog just to get a glimpse of my niece (I know Yana does!) and not to actually read my ramblings (no offense taken at all!!) so as a word of thanks for bearing with me, here's her picture :

As you can see, that's the wallpaper on my laptop. Simply adorable, isn't she?